Women, We Should Do Better

What would you do if you were in her shoes?

Photo by KEEM IBARRA on Unsplash

I read a tweet over the weekend that got my blood boiling. Someone said his brother nearly got killed while he was out jogging. I jog a lot, almost every afternoon. Maybe it’s time to set up that private gym in the garage. And these people running without masks.

I’ve been trying to do my part, even as I pant like a bitch on heat after the first corner because the damn mask is trying to suffocate me. But I wear it nonetheless. I want to do my part. We all have our parts to play. It’s your choice. You always have a choice.

That wasn’t what really got me upset. It’s the fact that in the next paragraph he said that his brother just found out that he had a 14-year-old son. Some woman called him up on Facebook and said, dude, I had your child 14 years ago. He went for a DNA test to confirm that the child was his. He was.

The reason why I am quite livid right now is that I want to know which person keeps a child from his father for 14 years? I mean really! I know that is how we get back to men, that’s how we punish them, we want them to suffer as we suffered. It’s been done for generations. We can justify all we want.

Photo by Chayene Rafaela on Unsplash

All you succeeded in doing is keeping away a father from his child. You think you got him back, but it is your own child who suffered without a father for 14 years. 
Dad couldn’t see his son walk for the first time, say his first words, see his first tooth coming out. Dad couldn’t teach him how to ride his tricycle. Dad wasn’t there for his first day at school.

We are not in a position to judge. We shouldn’t. It has been done. All we can do is move forward now. At least dad will be there now for the rest of his life. Thank you, mom, for giving dad that chance.

The reason I’m writing here is so that the next mom or mom-to-be who is coming before this very junction and having to make the same decision, will think twice and choose wisely. That she will consider the implications and not make an emotional decision. Let him know. He has the right to know. Ladies lets become a generation that does better. Not just in words, but actions too.

Photo by Chris Benson on Unsplash

However hard it might be at that moment. Make the right choice. Trust the process. It won’t let you down. There may be people around you who want to dissuade you. Tell you it won’t work, that you’re making a mistake.

At least one day you can look your son in the eye with the knowledge that you made the right decision for him. However, it turns out thereafter does not take away from the fact that when you were at the crossroads you chose wisely.

Life is short. We realise it now more than ever during this pandemic. A person can be taken from us at any moment. Therefore, make the right choices.

Don’t let your heart be troubled. For whatever you are going through has happened before, there were brave women before you and not so brave women. Which one will you be?


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